Couples Therapy

Intimate committed relationships can be a source of joy and fulfillment, but they can also be an arena in which our deepest vulnerabilities and fears get activated.  Partners are constantly engaged in a dance to maintain their connection while at the same time protect their vulnerabilities.  These two opposing but equally urgent needs are the basis for the development of repetitive negative patterns of relating that can seem impossible to break free of.

My goal is to provide a safe space for partners to explore these patterns and their accompanying thoughts and feelings, and, in so doing, create an environment where self and other can be more fully known.  My approach is insight-oriented and fosters a sense of curiosity and empathy towards each partner's experience of themself and of the relationship.  I also provide concrete, research-based tools to help couples learn how to reduce their reactivity, strengthen positive feelings towards one another, and engage in conflict resolution more effectively on their own.  I have experience with all aspects of relationship difficulties including:

• Frequent fights and misunderstandings
• Lack of a sense of closeness and intimacy

• Lack of trust

• Communication

• Sexual problems
• Conflicts over money, parenting, etc.
• Childhood trauma
• Infidelity
• Phase of life issues that affect the relationship (arrival of children, aging parents, etc.)

I also provide premarital counseling for couples wishing to explore their expectations of marriage, the prospect of having children, and other issues to help deepen their knowledge of one another and get the marriage off to a good start.

Here's an article I wrote  about a simple exercise for couples to help deepen their connection.

---